Well done! Confronting him was a step in the right direction. Unless he quits drinking and will never drink again his response was bs by the way; and it sounds like you know it was bs. So why are you trying so hard to be normal around this guy? I'm not surprised your confused you're trying to lie trying to deny reality confusion is the natural result. I mean you have reality, and you know what it is; and then there's the fake reality you're trying to create and your just getting torn between the two. So which one do you genuinely want? Do you want reality where this guy touched you, or do you want to run away from it into a fake one?
If you want the confusion to stop you just stop denying reality you accept it you tell the truth. In healthy reality when someone does something that makes you happy or hurt you react, you smile or you cry, you go towards them to get more of them in your life or you pull away and exclude them. You develop love for them or you never let them in your life again. Your trying to act normally but, normally, you need to react! You need to instead of burying it; deal with it, and stop letting it hurt your life.
When he does something to you, when anyone does something to you for good or bad react! Live your life. Slapping this guy yelling at him those are normal responses; less than normal when you get sexually assaulted actually. But they're still healthy and a start. It dosn't really matter what you do so long as you act "normally" by reacting how you genuinenly want to without all the clutter. Like you said cry and shout out what he's done. That sounds like a genuine uncluttered desire, so do it, it'll probably catch a few people off guard but it will be healthy for you. I can't really prove to you that what's healthy for you is good it's just a personal choice you'll have to eventually make whether you want to live a healthy, happy, life or not. So which life do you want?
You ask how can you love and hate someone so much at the same time? But do you even love or hate him at all? The reason you need to confront him outright for all the things he's done, for all the thoughts on your mind, is so that you'll be able to figure out exactly how you feel about him. You feel both "attraction" and hate because both were sparked in you. He was kind to you and then he was really horrible to you so both attraction and hate were sparked but now you don't know which one to really feel because you havn't confronted him yet. You havn't dealt with the two feelings yet to bring one to a close and the other into the light. And you do that by confronting him about all the things on your mind that you hold against him then you'll either be able to push him away or forgive him as a result. So deal with those two feelings; find out which one you want to feel and "can" feel(don't start feeling attraction again just so he can hurt you only feel which one you "can" feel as a result of his actions when you confront him) and take it from there.
I really think you should tell your parents too. Tell them and see what happens? The point isn't to get them to help you the point is what you said #### it all. Screw, all, the lies and just tell the truth live the truth. As stupid that might sound it means live as yourself, who you want to be, don't suppress yourself don't hold back and don't put up with something that hurts you. Just screw every complication that gets in the way of what you really want and put things into perspective. For example this guy was, one person, you could trust and talk to about anything for a few months. There will be many more that will come and many more that will go. There's nothing special about him he's just another person and you probably see dozens everyday, good and bad, he isn't the "only one" you could count on and trust in your life. And that's just simple reality. If your having a hard time finding other people it's not because they don't exist it's because you don't know how to find them so you just need to figure it out. I've known some awesome people who come and go in hours other's stick around for years it was just a matter of putting myself out there saying hi and sharing myself There aren't any absolutes, people who will be there for the rest of your lives, in my experience at least, but there are people who will be there for you as long as your lives are together and you need those type of people. Good people; not one's like this guy. Not ones that will hurt you without donig everything they can to make up for it.
I hope that helps, let me know how it turns out or what you think. Good luck.