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> Trust Issues In Relationships
Glen
post Mar 20 2008, 11:18 AM
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There's a name for someone who trusts people immediately...fool. Real trust grows gradually, over time, as each person risks a little more and doesn't get burned. This is why the only relationships where anyone can fully rest in trust are long term ones, like marriage. The slow growth of trust is also why, once the trust is broken, it's even more difficult to recover. This article is about working through these trust issues and coming out the other end with a stronger relationship.
Trust Grows Slowly: Now that I've been married over 20 years, and we've been through a thing or two, I've discovered...

Read complete article!
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Wildflower67
post Apr 9 2010, 09:00 AM
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How do I get over my issues of trust? I am really struggling with this one. I am in a long distance relationship and have been together for nearly a year. I find the seperation from my partner really tough and think I have speration anxiety. Before I met my boyfriend I had been in an abusive relationship and this I am not proud of.. it took its toll on me and now I struggle with so many things.. Help and advice would be appreciated
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samarxc
post Sep 30 2010, 04:36 PM
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i need help terribly!!! my husband and i have been together for almost 2 years. we have a one month old baby girl. i love my husband more than anything but im having major trust issues and its not because of anything he has done! that is whats so confusing to me! he is supportive, loving, understanding, and a great father to my little girl. i think it might have to do with the last guy i was with before i met my husband.... this guy cheated on me and got another woman pregnant while we were dating... i guess i have never gotten over it. i hate that my husband has to suffer because of what another guy did to me... here lately i have been getting on my husbands email, facebook, and ive even been checking our phone records! its ridiculous! i keep telling myself i wont do it anymore, but its like i cant stop! i always am questioning my husband about things i see when im going through his stuff.. its like im just waiting to find something. he keeps getting more and more angry the more i do it. i know im pushing him away, and thats the last thing i want. i know for a fact he is my soulmate and i dont want anyone else! what should i do to help myself deal with these trust issues???
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AnneV
post Oct 11 2010, 05:37 PM
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QUOTE (samarxc @ Sep 30 2010, 05:36 PM) *
i need help terribly!!! my husband and i have been together for almost 2 years. we have a one month old baby girl. i love my husband more than anything but im having major trust issues and its not because of anything he has done! that is whats so confusing to me! he is supportive, loving, understanding, and a great father to my little girl. i think it might have to do with the last guy i was with before i met my husband.... this guy cheated on me and got another woman pregnant while we were dating... i guess i have never gotten over it. i hate that my husband has to suffer because of what another guy did to me... here lately i have been getting on my husbands email, facebook, and ive even been checking our phone records! its ridiculous! i keep telling myself i wont do it anymore, but its like i cant stop! i always am questioning my husband about things i see when im going through his stuff.. its like im just waiting to find something. he keeps getting more and more angry the more i do it. i know im pushing him away, and thats the last thing i want. i know for a fact he is my soulmate and i dont want anyone else! what should i do to help myself deal with these trust issues???

Don't deal with this alone, key is communication. It can be so many things, having a child can change the dynamic of a marriage, your past, etc.. Talk to your husband, tell him about your insecurities, your fears and talk. I was married for 20 years when I found out that my husband cheated on me and his affair produced a child. I had to deal with this on my own as his idea of dealing with this issue was to not talk about it and hope that it would disappear, we might have had a chance if he would deal with it and talk to me but he won't. I can't get answers and now it's too late. Don't wait, don't try to deal with this alone, you are in a marriage and one without trust is not worth having. If this is important to you then talk and listen because this will not be the only bump in the road and if you can get past this bump together then when more come your way it will be easier to get past together. Trust is something you have to work at and continue working at, Communicate!!!
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DevynRose
post Nov 19 2010, 10:16 PM
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I really need help... anyone's help..
I'm very young, I have been in a relationship for over a year, and it's the best thing that has ever happened to me. I know that I'm young, and I'm not expecting it to last forever, but I would like it to, and we both try our hardest to stay together, without forcing it. I think we have a very very understanding relationship, we rarely fight, and when we do it is simple, we both say what we need to and then say sorry. We are best friends and very much in love.

But... I have a very very low self esteem.. but i honestly have no reason to.. I have just always been insecure. I never think I'm good enough for anything or anyone. I have never been through anything that would make me like this. It is causing so much issues in our relationship. Because of my insecurities, i have the biggest trust issues. I have never been hurt, so again i have no reason to. I don't think he would ever ever cheat, or do anything to hurt me, but for some reason those thoughts continue to pop into my head. I ask him if i look pretty, or if he would ever want anyone else constantly. He tells me I'm beautiful, and says a lot of sweet stuff, so i don't know why i still feel the need to ask him. I used to tell myself when i was little that when i grew up I'd never be a clingy. bossy girlfriend, I always wanted to be a guys best friend, I wanted to have an non controlling relationship. Now i am scared that i am clingy, or that i ask to much of him. I think that this is slowing tearing us apart.. But it has always been the main issue, it leaves and then returns again. I told him once when we were fighting, that ever fight was a brick wall we had to climb, and after ever brick wall, the next one was higher and harder to climb, but each brick wall that we climb, gave us strength to help us over the next, so brick wall after brick wall, we were just getting stronger. I cannot tell if this is one of those brick walls, because it keeps coming back up.

I really need someones help. I do not know what to do.
How can i get rid of my trust issues and insecurities?
Please help,
Devyn.
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